Unsteady
by Andelin
Summary: Just when Harvey thinks he’s got life figured out, a curveball is send his way. Set in early Season 8 [Darvey] One Shot


_The things you find when you look through your work computer… It's short, it's nothing special, it came to me while listening to X Ambassadors' Unsteady almost a year ago now._

_Apology to Robert Zane for being so OOC in this. We all know he loves Red. He just had a hard time showing it in the first few episodes of Season 8._

_Biggest thanks to Heather (hjlbsw) for always supporting me and being my sounding board._

_The story is set in 8A, but Darvey actually got their stuffing together at the Machel wedding._

* * *

The first time it happened, Harvey thought it was a panic attack.

He hadn't had one in years but then again, his life was smooth sailing until this point. He had the job, the friend and the girl - even though they were going through a rough patch at the moment.

With Mike and Rachel leaving and Robert taking over the firm, everything changed. Harvey didn't want to be Managing Partner. He realized that he loved playing the field too much to sit on the sidelines and coach. But he hadn't come this far to being bossed around either. And not just by Robert, but by Donna as well.

She was his conscience, his better half, and she had always bossed him around, but this was different. He knew that she deserved her new position, he wouldn't have made her COO otherwise, but their new dynamic needed some getting used to. It has always been "Harvey Donna against the rest of the world" and now she has taken everyone else's side but his. She made nice with Samantha, pushed Alex's position in the firm and fought her own battles against Robert.

He had always known that he needed her more than she needed him, but it still hurt that apparently she didn't need him at all.

On top of that, his brother was lying to him, getting a divorce and he had to fight to keep his niece and nephew from having their lives permanently altered.

So he wasn't surprised when his vision got blurry, his chest tightened and he had trouble breathing right after Donna yelled at him in the lobby.

She did fucking earn her job, Harvey knew that. He wasn't even sure why he made her believe otherwise.

But for once in this shitty week, he needed to feel on top. To feel appreciated for what he does and what he made other people do.

It wasn't fair that Donna bore the brunt of his anger, but she was there and he knew she would forgive him. She was Donna. He fucked up plenty of times and she always came back.

He managed to move to one of the benches by the doors, put his head between his knees and tried to elevate his breathing. The moment he realized that the nausea was missing but his left arm and the side of his neck felt numb, he knew it wasn't a panic attack. He lost both his father and his grandfather to a heart attack. He recognized the signs. But he was Harvey Specter. He was above this. He had to be. He lived a stressful life with little sleep and too much coffee but he also worked out regularly and at least tried to have a balanced diet. The breathing seemed to help, as the pain lessened and he was actually able to stand up again a few minutes later. Probably a false alarm. He still dropped a message to Ray, asking him to take him home and sat back down on the bench to wait.

He had to drop by the office again that evening to hand David Fox his ass but he felt way better at that point and decided to push the memories of this afternoon out of his head.

When he decided to give up the Managing Partner position, he thought he would be able to concentrate on winning cases again. Instead he was in constant silent battle with Robert and Samantha and had to reassure Alex every ten minutes that his name would go up on the wall next. The firm was his life. His first love. But was this it? Without Mike and in some ways without Donna, work just wasn't what it used to be. He once told Donna that he didn't have dreams, he had goals.

He was still the best closer in the city, he became Senior Partner, got his name on the door and after Jessica left he was Managing Partner. If only for a short while. He achieved all his goals in life. Where was he supposed to go from here?

* * *

Things with Donna didn't improve over the next few weeks. He still spent his nights alone and the domestic bliss they got themselves into after Mike and Rachel's wedding got violently destroyed by one of their many fights. He wanted to tell the world about them, she feared how it would look to the outside world. Who fucking cared about people? Harvey was not willing to let others be part of his relationship and she shouldn't either.

"When I wanted to sell The Donna, they thought I had as much worth as the dirt under their shoes because I was a secretary. What do you think their opinion will be when they see me as a secretary who slept her way into a higher position?"

"But you didn't sleep your way there."

"Do you really think people care about the facts?"

After that, they had only talked about work-related things in weeks and even those conversations were few and far between. Donna only came to him if she had absolutely no other choice and they didn't even get the chance to talk about the war that was brewing in their midst.

The situation at the firm would soon turn to bloodshed. Alex and Samantha were going head to head on a case and neither he nor Robert were willing to back down on their position.

It all came to explosion the day after Samantha won the lawsuit, due to Robert paying off the other side.

* * *

"You are done leading this firm."

Harvey stomped into Robert's office, Louis and Donna on his tail.

"Why? Because I once did what you do all the time? You think I will leave the firm in your hands? You better remember why I had to come and save your asses. Without me, you were nothing: an arrogant dick head, his secretary and a man who leaves work to bed his girlfriend. Without me, this firm would have been just a memory in people's mind by now. You don't know how to successfully run this firm."

Donna chose that moment to bring her plan forward.

"It seems that neither one of you is right for this. Have you all forgotten what this is really about? Clients and cases and a united front. No one cares whose name goes on the door next. Neither Alex nor Samantha have even been her long enough to deserve that title. You fight like children and you made promises to bring people in, without talking about it with the rest of us.

We are supposed to be a family. United. And here you are fighting each other like cocks.

You men go ruffle your feathers and leave the leading of the firm to me! Neither one of you was ever right for the job anyway."

Robert looked at her in disbelief and snorted out a laugh.

"You want to be Managing Partner? Donna, you can't be serious. I admire you and your skills, but this is a real job with responsibilities. I will not let my life be ruled by Harvey Specter's bed warmer."

"What the fuck did you just say to her?" Harvey took a threating step towards Robert, the look on his face murderous.

"Harvey, this is my battle. Stay out of it!" Donna pushed herself between Robert and Harvey.

"Oh, come on. We all know you guys were banging since my daughter's wedding."

Always graceful, Donna chose to ignore him.

"Robert, I see where you are coming from. I have no fancy degree that says I am trained for the job, that doesn't make me less qualified though. Before this firm was your life, it was mine. I am grateful that you came in and saved us and I'm gladly keeping your name where it is. But I am taking over now and if you can't live with that, you are free to leave."

"Are you threatening me?"

"I am giving you an option. You can accept a subordinate role or you can leave. I am not seeing this firm go down because you are at war with each other."

"And you think anyone in this firm is backing you? You sure as hell won't have my vote."

"I have more than I need. Louis met with the partners this morning and they agreed that it is time for a change."

Robert turned towards Harvey again.

"And you are ready to back her? Do you really want that? Her being your boss?"

The moment it happened, he immediately knew that this was the real deal. His voice got stuck in his throat, his chest tightened and with one final look at Donna, Harvey's knees gave out and he dropped to the floor. The last words he heard were the ones of his love:

"Harvey, hold on. I got you."

* * *

"Leave it to Harvey Specter to time a heart attack perfectly. This way he never had to give his input on me being his new boss. Easy way out like always. He survived, obviously, but had to stay at the hospital for nearly a month due to complications. And by complications, I mean his absolute unwillingness to listen to the doctors. He tried to sneak out one week into his stay only to collapse right in front of the hospital entrance. He was in sweatpants, a shirt and barefoot because he was too weak to bend down to get his shoes. The lesson I learned that day, was to never leave him alone for longer than ten minutes.

We had to restructure the whole firm with both the former and the most recent Managing Partner gone and I tried to do as much work as possible from his hospital room. Thankfully Samantha was a great addition to the team and Alex finally learned that we were his family and not his enemies.

Louis stayed with him whenever I had to go into the office and Mike flew in for a long weekend. He had almost daily talks with Stan and by the day he was allowed to go home, he realized what an idiot he had been for over a decade. He still is sometimes, but I think he learned his lesson now."

"How often are you going to tell him this story? It doesn't get better with time, you know?"

Harvey stepped into the room, walking up to his wife of almost a year and kissed his newborn son's head.

"It's the one story that always puts him to sleep with a smile on his face. And he can't hear enough how mommy saved the day while daddy was being a little shit."

"I had a heart attack."

"You actually had two and went into cardiac arrest. But that doesn't change the fact that you were an idiot and that I almost lost you because of it."

Tears started to pool in her eyes. It had been a year to the day that Harvey dropped to the floor in Robert's old office and her heart stopped along with his.

She can joke about it with their son, but she will never get the image out of her head. It scarred her for life. She died a hundred deaths in the 13 minutes it took for the ambulance to arrive. Louis saved his life that day. Their friend's quick thinking and his fearless use of the defibrillator got Harvey's heart beating again and she will never be able to thank him enough for it.

It was a while until Harvey realized he wasn't invincible and it was time to step back and shorten his daily work hours. She had already established herself as Managing Partner by the time he was released from the hospital and with the backing of the whole firm and the way she stepped up to the challenge, no one in New York questioned her position. She blossomed like never before and with Harvey finally pulling his head out of his ass, they got married three weeks after Harvey dropped to one knee in his hospital room.

It was a small, intimate ceremony at 620 Loft and Garden with just their closest friends and families. A month later they found out she was pregnant and now six weeks after their son's birth, it was time for Donna to return to work. She would not work full time, but they decided that Harvey would stay home with Henry and she kept building their empire. An empire that they were now able to pass on.

She had always known that Harvey would make a great father, he had a heart of gold after all, but the way he took to their baby boy surprised them both. He didn't even think twice about reducing his hours even further to be able to look after him. His physician and Dr Lipschitz encouraged it and he had never felt better in his life.

One year ago, Harvey thought he had lost it all: his standing in the firm, his physical fitness but most of all, Donna and with her all chances of happiness. If he had known that stress, a bad diet and the love of his life yelling at him would lead to all this, he would have let himself go way sooner. But he was certain that everything happened just as it was supposed to. All the ups and downs, heartbreaks and panic attacks were worth it. This was the life he was supposed to live and he couldn't wait to see how their future would pan out.

Harvey took his sleeping son out of Donna's arms and put him down in his crib. After they both dropped another kiss to Henry's forehead and a whispered "Sleep well. Mommy and daddy love you," they left the nursery and made their way into their own room.

Tonight, he would finally be able to take his wife to bed again. And maybe, just maybe he would be able to convince her to try for Baby #2.


End file.
